Article And Photos By: Darren McKeag
Originally Published In The August 2013 Issue Of Cycle Source Magazine
For those of you that don’t know, the Vintage Torque Fest was founded and promoted by John Wells. This event is like no other in the Midwest and has been a huge success over the years. Hundreds of cars and bikes show up to this great event to raise money for an even greater cause – Helping Hannah’s Heart Foundation. Hannah Wells is the daughter of John and she has Critical Aortic Stenosis, or related congenital heart defects. The proceeds raised at this event go towards Hannah and other families that are burdened with the medical expenses associated with this disease. This year’s Torque Fest raised over $20k for Hannah and other families; a truly great success considering what the weather was like. As this year’s event approached, I was racing to get one of my chops ready and get all of m y tattoo appointments done. In order to stick to the schedule, I was to be in Cedar Rapids Thursday evening to meet up with Big Don, and then head over to our good brother Scott Takes’ Underground Studios. Tattooing my last client of the day, I look out the door and notice that it was snowing! May 2nd in Iowa and we had over 2 inches of snow on the ground and it was still falling! As the old saying goes, “If you don’t like the weather, stick around, it will change.”
My Thursday was coming to an end, and my only option was to load the bike into the Green Dragon and head to CR. What is normally an hour trip took almost 2 hours with all of the snow, sleet and rain. Once at Big Don’s compound, we made other preparations for the weekend before heading over to Underground Studios. On our way, I received the ill-fated text I was not wanting. My third in command, my brother Paul from Bare Knuckle, was not going to make it. At this point, I had to revert to plan B — alcohol — and lots of it. Big Don and I purchased every possible beverage from the liquor store prior to arriving at Scott’s. Now, if you’re not familiar with Underground’s social protocol, Thursday nights is the night for social gatherings. It involves men among men, motorbike shit, talking about making beef jerky, riverboat gambling, and catching up with good brothers that I don’t have the chance to see all the time. With the weather acting like it was January and the studio filling up, it was sure to be a good night. I started drinking heavily and jumped right into the middle of all my CR brothers and partied.
With the evening going great and thoughts of the Torque Fest weekend ahead, everything seemed to be in place. Deep in conversation with some of my brothers, I heard a few people over by the door yell in excitement. Not wanting to miss what was going on I turned to see what all the fuss was about. To my surprise, Paul walked through the door with our good buddy and loud mouth, “Gotta-go Joe.” Come to find out that my ill-fated text was all a set-up between Paul and Big Don. Apparently these guys wanted to surprise me. They had truly accomplished what they had set out to do. I was glowing from ear-to-ear and bouncing off the walls like a naked tattooed man in a hotel room full of hot, naked, professional women…oh wait, wrong story. The weekend was going to be great. With the weather getting worse by the hour, the Underground Studio was buzzing with motorbike chat. Occasionally I would glance across the room and just smile, seeing everyone talking, toasting, hugging, and doing what motorbike brothers do. Life was good. As most evenings like this go, everyone lost track of time and before I realized, it was 3 a.m. and we were gassed. No one wanted to stop, including the Great Carney Asada. So, the logical thing to do was move the party to Big Don’s compound and keep on, keepin’ on. Once we arrived, everyone was about asleep from the trip there, except for Carney. He decided he wanted to play. Big Don, however, wanted him to settle down for the night, so after a few body slams, Carney was out and we all proceeded to get out the Sharpies. We were all giggling like a bunch of damn school boys that had just caught their first glimpse of the babysitter’s breasts as she bent over…shit, wrong story again! Damn!
The next morning’s clouds kept us from seeing any sun, and the rain continued to fall. We cleared our heads and made our way to Torque Fest in Dubuque, Iowa. Iowa’s showers were not forgiving at all and pounded us all day long. Arriving at the fairgrounds in Dubuque, we found a huge waterlogged lot to park in, and made our way into the closest vendor building to shelter ourselves from the rain. The day was definitively gloomy, but once again, we found ourselves amongst good brothers and began to drink away the previous night’s pain. It was going to be a great day at Torque Fest. All of the motorbikes were inside vendor building B and it just so happened that my good brother Jeremy from Relic and Scott from Underground were inside doing what they do best — painting. Scott was working on a large airbrush painting and Jeremy was busy pinstriping anything you could give him. Also, the bar and bands were directly adjacent to this building. Technically speaking, we didn’t even have to go back outside in the monsoon. We literally had everything we needed to survive. Friday ended up being a great day full of music, brothers and beers. One of the last moments I remember in the evening was us destroying a Perkins’ restaurant, offending the waitress, and Big Don and I wrestling in the lobby of the hotel, which by the way I lost. Apparently, Big Don is heavier than I had anticipated, therefore he crushed me. The night-desk attendant clearly didn’t want us destroying the hotel lobby.
With Saturday morning upon us, and none of us wanting to get out of bed, I quickly called the front desk of the hotel to purchase another night. This bought us some much needed rest to prepare for what was shaping up to be a sunny day outside. We headed back and it was packed. With just over 600 cars on site and several motorbikes inside and outside, things were truly hopping. Paul and I made our way around the swap meet area, looking for any treasures we might find. With the entire CR crew showing up to camp that night as well as Kruse, Milwaukee Mike and Ben, aka Svenson, rolling in, it was going to be a good night by the fire. As the sun set over the rolling hills of Dubuque, we made our way to the local liquor store and managed to buy them out of High Life and some PBR. Back at the campground, the fire was blazing high, and the drinks were flowing smoothly. Again, I found myself amongst brothers, sisters, and family, watching everyone enjoying their evening. At one point, I believe Ashley had started the grill and cooked food 7 different times for people. With the fire a blazing, beers a flowing and Fletch speaking his philosophy, surrounded by hotrods and bikes whipping nutties in the wet grass, life was good. Once again we had another Torque Fest under our belts. Mark the dates (May 2-4, 2014) on your social calendar for next year — it’s well worth it. Sunday was our day out of there, so I wanted to show Paul and Joe the amazing National Motorcycle Museum in Anamosa. If you’re anywhere near the Northwest side of Iowa, take the time and go through the museum, you’ll truly enjoy the experience. Until the next event, be safe and see you on the road!
